She remembered looking into the mirror and wishing she didn’t exist. She could still feel every moment of hurt that they’d gifted her. Her mother thought that she’d make things alright by telling her that she was beautiful. But it never worked. Then she stopped eating all of her favourite things and the only sorrow that she felt was being away from food. At least looking into the mirror made her happy now.
She walked into the room with hesitation. She knew he wouldn’t look the same. His nose had a tube stuck under it and there were scary things stuck in his arm. Her mind did a rewind to the happier days when childhood had hidden the truths of old age and death. Her heart cried for those precious moments when he’d been both a mother and father to her. She managed to smile through the tears that were threatening to come down, because he smiled at her.
Her bookshelves decorated the walls. Spines of various colours stood out in the sunshine that came through the windows. She had spent hours here, running her fingers over the titles. If she caught a speck of dust on her beloved possessions, she would clean it away immediately. Only one section bothered her; it was the shelf that had two empty slots. She never should’ve let them borrow her books.
She drew an outline of her full lips, moving the pencil like a wand. Her fingers danced over the sleek tubes that stood in three lines on her dresser. She had the names memorised but they never failed to excite her. Finally, she settled on Chatterbox. She needed more. Her hands got busy again until she located the best nude gloss. Ten minutes later, her lips were ready but her eyes were still undone.
Memories of you,
Leave me in tears.
Glimpses of sorrow,
Into our past together.
It had seemed too good,
Because beauty rarely survives.
My gratitude for each moment,
And hope to meet elsewhere.
Two pairs of eyes lit up with love. They knew she’d come visit with food and cuddles until the moment they’d be taken away from the world. She laughed and talked to them as one waited patiently and the other stood up to greet her. The tails wagged with gratitude as they chewed their meal. The voiceless beings seemed unaware of the disapproving looks around them. But she saw it and felt it and wished for a nicer world.
They weren’t long or soft. In fact, they were kind of dry and frizzy. When she ran her fingers through them, it wasn’t about being flirtatious but really about moving them away. The good thing was that people didn’t notice her hair as much as she did. They were too captivated by her eyes. They were eyes that conveyed a hundred messages. Sometimes she didn’t even have to talk.